Archive for the ‘Arnold Schwarzenner’ Category

All I want for Christmas is..

December 12, 2006

I know lots of my loyal readers are very keen to buy me a Christmas present or two, so here is my list of what I want from Santa this year:

  1. Limited edition single of the ultra-rare Chico and Ricky Martin Duet
  2. Life sized cut-outs of all of Girls aloud except the ginger-one
  3. A giants dice: preferably monochrome, 6-sized, cubic with rounded edges
  4. Davey Havok style clip-on Emo-swoop
  5. Little Chris Calendar 2007
  6. Arnold Schwarzeneggers Encyclopaedia of Modern Bodybuilding
  7. A LCD speedometer, Corolla compatible
  8. Snorkel and Flippers set
  9. Some skin-tight white drain-pipe jeans like Johnny Borrell Wears
  10. My weight in Bock Artois

Pictured above Davey Havok, best swoop in the world?

Pete Graham xXx


Wally Santa Gets the Sack

December 7, 2006

As it’s now December I decided to pick a particularly festive Wally this Week. A Father Christmas working at Harrods has received the Sack for inappropriate behaviour. It’s reported that the mischievous Father Christmas had made lewd remarks to teenage girls about sitting on his lap among other comments which received numerous complaints. It has not been confirmed if this Santa exposed himself like cross-houses wild-man James “Gibbous” Craig did in 2004. The full story can be read here on Yahoo News Many thanks to Kenny Lee for suggesting this weeks wally and for cooking me a pizza on Tuesday.

This Bad Santa behaviour reminded me of the Festive Comedy “Bad Santa”. Here is a list of my 10 top Christmas Films (lets see if it causes as much controversy as my Top 7 Robots list):

  1. Home Alone 1
  2. Home Alone 2
  3. Die Hard
  4. Scrooged
  5. The Santa Clause (staring Home Improvements Tim Allen)
  6. The Nighmare before Christmas
  7. The Snowman
  8. The Grinch That Stole Christmas
  9. Die Hard 2
  10. Home Alone 3 (for years I refused to watch it due to the lack of Mcauley Culkin, but its actually quite good)

NOTE: Jingle All The Way has not been included as I haven’t seen it. I am ashamed to admit this being a huge Arnie Fan. If anyone would like to lend me a copy then that would make my day!

Also Can anyone confirm if Oliver May look-alike and WWE Superstar the Big Show is in Jingle All The Way as a Giant Santa?

Did anyone see the Christmas Hollyoaks special 2 years ago with Tony Hutchinson as Scrooge, it was absolutely amazing!

Here’s last weeks Wally of the Week.

Pete Graham xXx

Pregnant Man – Wally of the Week

November 30, 2006

Charles Sibindana stole a certificate from a clinic during his pregnant girlfriend’s check-up. He substituted his own details in and took time-off work (7 days). However his employers noticed that the note was from a gynaecologist and have fined him. Congratulations Charles you are this weeks Wally of the Week!

Above a picture of Arnold Schwarzenegger being touched by a ugly troll. This picture was taken from the hilarious 1994 film Junior where Arnold plays a pregnant man.

  • FACT: Arnold Schwarzenner played Danny Devito twin brother in the hilarious 1988 film Twins
  • FACT: Arnold and Danny Devito are not really twins
  • FACT: Arnold has never actually been pregnant but could be if he really wanted to

While researching the film Junior I stumbled upon the website The Four World Film Review. As the name suggests people get to submit film reviews but can only use 4 words or less. Here are some of my favourite junior reviews:

  • Conan the Ovarian
  • Arnieficially inseminated
  • Conan the boob Aryan
  • The Materni-nator
  • Schwarzen-preggers

More observant readers will have noticed they are all amazing puns! If you have any suggestions for next weeks wally then drop me an email. Heres a link to last Weeks Wally in case you missed it.

Pete xXx